Personality conflicts occur when two (or more) people find themselves in disagreement, not over a particular issue or incident, but due to a fundamental incompatibility in their personalities, their approaches to things, or their life style. Personality conflicts are perhaps one of the most challenging areas of corrective action.
Some people are easy to be around and some are not. All of us seem to have at least a few difficult friends in our lives. They can range from those who are a mild annoyance to those who can make life seem nearly intolerable at times. People at this negative end of the spectrum, especially if we have contact with them on a daily basis, can jeopardize our mental and emotional wellness over time. Particularly if we lack the tools for responding to them in an adaptive way.
Who Are the Difficult People?
Defining a “difficult person” depends on our own tolerances and abilities to respond adaptively to them. There are some people who have personality characteristics that many people find disagreeable. Although the following list is by no means exhaustive, here are some examples:
- People who dominate conversations and never give anyone else a chance to talk…
- People who constantly berate themselves…
- Skeptics…
- Addicts…
- People who can’t make a decision…
- Gossips…
- People who manipulate you…
- People who lack consistency…
- Angry people…
- People who feel terribly uncomfortable around others…
- The expert on everything…
Methods for Dealing with Difficult People
- Stay Centered
- Assertiveness
- Confrontation
- Respond to the Underlying Message
- Terminating the Relationship
7 Steps to Resolve Personality Conflicts in the Workplace
- Avoid discussing the issue with other colleagues.
- Do not respond immediately to the person. Give yourself time to think through your response.
- Look in the mirror – How are you contributing to this situation?
- Reframe the situation. This allows you to take a step back and not engage.
- Focus on other personal strengths.
- Use cooperative communication.
- Document all interactions in a neutral manner.